House Fire - Evil Cat Loyal Dog. Its a great headline and apparently a true story. Go figure. Dog saves its owner after the nasty cat starts a fire. Could the cat be charged with arson? And what do you tell the insurance company?
Lost Dog Ad. Palm Iranian dogs? Sure, it sounds a bit like that. Pomeranian. Im guessing this was an transcription mistake, not a failure to understand the breed by the dog owner. Lets hope they found him.
Osamah Rental. I wonder how many people actually called young Osamah to offer him and his Saudi friends a place to stay. Im sure its all perfectly innocent, but its an unfortunate name. Where is Osama Bin Laden anyway?
School Closure Protest. Its a great headline - and perfectly accurate. Im just curious on what can be achieved by keeping the kids at home. You've heard of teachers going out on strike. But striking kids? I'll be darned.
Bride to Be Gun. Sure, i can see that with the pink handle, this Smith and Wesson 38 special is designed for a woman. But it really a gift idea for a wedding? Why is it perfect for the bride to be? Handgun wedding?
Massive Coupon Discounts. $50,000 off your new house purchase. Sure, thats a little hard to believe, but it could be true. But take a look at the scissors - clip and save. Does this mean that if you dont bring this coupon with you, there wont be any discount?
Not Guilty Criminal. "Please, find me not guilty of the crimes i have committed". Wow, thats some defence strategy. Im thinking that Mr Spates, who was convicted of murder by the jury, should keep his mouth shut in future.
Lawyer Killer. Miguel Trujillo has a new attorney. And isnt that a job you would relish. The man accused of killing his former lawyer was appointed a new attorney from the public defender's office after he sacked the last one. Yeah, so sorry, it was the one before that one that he is supposed to have killed.
Closed Postal Office. There are often complaints about the postal service. No surprise really when some offices just refuse to open. Nice that they are running an ad to tell us that. Time to use couriers instead im thinking.
Nasty Christmas Message. Sure, its probably not the nicest Christmas Card she would have recieved. But is it worth a call to the police? I suppose there was a warning. It doesnt say what would happen to her if she doesnt keep them closed.
Murderer's New Life. Its a sad but funny story, one you may have heard of before. James Klindt was convicted of murdering his wife and cutting up her body. He spent 20 years in jail. On his release he set up a small take away restaurant. Nice of the newspaper to make reference to his former life in their "promotion" of his business...I wonder how business is? A quick google search revealved that Klindt has been in trouble with the police a number of times since being released. Poor fella.
Pepsi Lime Twist Advert. I cant confirm if this is or isnt a real advertisiment for Pepsi. But it is a crack up. Im not so certain however if a lime doing this to your drink is a sure fire way to sell more Pepsi. In fact for me, its kind of a turn off. I know one thing...you cant get Pepsi with lime where i live anymore.
Avoid High Prices Air Conditioning. So all it takes is a couple of days and a cool 5.5 million dollars and a Lennox Air Conditioning Central unit could be yours. Maybe its supposed to be 5 and a half thousand dollars. Or maybe they think people who live in raised ranches are made of money.
Latest Counterfeit Tactics. Im racking my brain to work out which person here is the most stupid. The person who thought it was ok to make a bill which doesnt exist in regular currency, or the person that accepted it at McDonalds. Its hard to believe that two separate individuals could be such idiots. So which President features on the $4 bill? Ronald Reagan? May as well be Ronald McDonald.
Chris Mulloy and Robert Cusack - Dumb and Dumber. I was struggling to believe that this was actually real. So i googled it. Yes, it is true. Mulloy and Cusack, modern day idiots. I just would have loved to have been there. A bird flying out of your suitcase? Two pygmy monkeys in your pants? Holy God. That smuggling business cant be much fun at times. Lucrative, yes. Painful, you bet!
Health Alert Circumcision Danger. Its a great headline. And if you werent to read the article you would be wondering how some poor cop's nose got in the way of the Mohel's snippers. Like, what was he doing down there? No, poor fella had it bitten off by someone, probably in a fight. Highly charged events are circumcision ceremonies apparently.
The Million Dollar Bill. Its unfortunate for N SPurgeon that real million dollar bills dont actually exist. At least, not in most of the western world. And anyway, if there was a million dollar bill, its unlikely to have fallen out of someone's pocket. I mean seriously, where would they spend it? Can you make change for a million?